Weather Forecaster Gifts

"Well, now the flood warning's been downgraded to just a light mid-afternoon sprinkle."

In case of prediction error: Umbrella in glass case.

Honest Weather Forecasting

Although the Weather Service hasn't predicted rain, certain indicators can't be ignored.

"Argh! It's going to rain! My arthritis!"

"..and now I'll pointlessly show you the isobar map as usual."

"What happens to old economists?"

Never mind spring. What do you predict for the economy?

'Tomorrow, it may be warm and sunny... or cold and snowy... or rainy... or... hey, it depends on the weather, folks!'

Snowman directors look at 'Anticipated snow fall this season' chart.

"My back says 'low pressure', my joints say 'cold' and my old UFC injury says 'snow'. Back to you, Katie."

'..and showers over Wimbledon may lead to outbreaks of Cliff Richard later.'

'Tommorow will be even brighter than today, thanks to my new anti-depressant...'

'I'm going to need a Margin of Error or I can't publish your prediction of 6 more weeks of winter.'

'I told you about the march solar flares before you went out, didn't I?'

'How long did you say you have been a weather forecaster?'

"Polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons are falling upstate, while simple showers of sulfur and nitrogen are blanketing the central countries. Toxic air pollutants will be prevalent in all areas and may endanger some lower forms of aquatic life. For the rest of us, enjoy the sun and the weekend."

Weather forecaster

Drizzle Chasers

"Hey, we'd fight to the last Spartan if this rain would let up."

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

"Oh hell! I'm just a fraud with a five day fraudcast!"

'Bad news, I'm afraid. You've passed your lie detector test.'

You wouldn't believe the screams of joy I hear when I announce a school closing...and that's just the teachers!

"Where's the bad winter they predicted?"

Weather Centre Karaoke. Man singing - "Send in the clouds."

'What's that piece of string for?' 'It's a weather device. When it moves, it's windy, and when it's wet it's raining.'

Indigenous knowledge vs. climate projections and weather forecasts.

"A mass of fair-weather friends are moving ahead of this intense line of thunderstorms, descending upon unsuspecdting acquaintances in sunnier parts of the region!"

US Winter Weather Map.

"We have had a flood warning. But we' re just waiting for Michael Fish to confirm it."

"I don't care what the revised forecast for the winter is. The wasps have built their nests higher up in the trees than usual, and that's proof enough for me."

'Expecting a bit of wet weather Reg...?'

The Weather Channel Fall Lineup

"What's happened to the weather analytical program?" "Frozen solid!"