Warfare Maestro Gifts

Military conductor

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

Cat plays an arcade game that involves shooting at gun into a mouse hole.

1 Only Smart Hammer Instructions

"Home school marching band"

"Holy hell. I should not have based my whole personality around this..."

"... and come out fighting, boys."

War Heros Variety Night (playing a tune on his medals).

'There was a slight accident in shop class. I welded my braces together.'

Fenton always makes a backup hard copy of his mental notes.

"Wow! This car has a continental kit, train horn, smoothed-out firewall, polyurethane bushings and a 2400-CFM fan! I have a long way to go!"

Elwood 'I Can Fix This Myself' McGrunzen

Arnold's clone refuses to workout: 'You're a huge disappointment, dude.'

Happy Birthday! I wasn't sure what sort of music you like...

"You still working on your car?"

'I play heavy metal.'

'Hup, two, three, four! Hup, two, three, four!'

'Where are you going, I already locked out that pump.' - 'CARL'S on shift!'

'Nothing to do? Why don't you read the refrigerator.'

'Spend all morning on a cryptorchidectomy...'

Fox Holes

"Dang! This guy's good!"

"I know this sounds like a line, but nice shooting."

A bulge of bodybuilders

'Your car has failed it's MOT.' - 'Oh, b***ocks.' - 'I'm going to replace your lambda control.' - 'I don't even know what that is...' - 'It's expensive. That's all you need to know. My little blue victim.' - 'Gah.'

"It might be time to start training your legs!"

'I just got a text from HQ. Whatever it is we do, it ain't rocket science.'

Scrapbooking in the 22nd Century.

A blacksmith shaping a horse shoe on an anvil.

Knitting techniques

"We're reviewing the security tape to see if you made it into the garage before the warranty ended."

"If it weren't for our fine workmanship, your car would have fallen apart before the warranty expired, instead of the day after."

"I'm not sure who's winning. The rules are very complicated."

He lived and died for golf.