War Room Humorist Pillows

"How long has it BEEN upside down?"

"His first out-of-body experience."

Cat in a tank...

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

'At ease, soldier.'

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

French Army knife

'Does my bum look big in this?'

'...and this is the Mess.'

"Did you call for a Medic?"

'At last! Some decent kit.'

'It's been five years since leaving Iraq and I'm still getting the sand out my ears.'

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

Banting in the Yeomanry

At a Country House

Bed Fellow

"Sir, the platoon suffered heavy casualties from a roadside IUD."

General's Coin Toss

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

'Gravity wins - again.'

US Camouflage School

Golf war: 'Fore!'

'As you wish Santa. But if we allow them to share our bed only once, be prepared to put up with them every night!'

"The bomb destroys only all life but not object! This means that our troops can have fun plundering and pillaging. War doesn't have to be inhuman, right?"

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

The Emperor of Irony

'I know you didn't just reach through the torpedo tube and grab those fish.'

'And don't shrink it in a hot wash.'

'President George P. D. Q. ?3 Bush today called for Gulf War VIII'....'

The Bengal Lancers/Bingo Lancers/Bagel Lancers/Bungle Lancers

Beware of the dog.

Peacekeeping?

'At the moment, it's only weakness is flypaper.' - (spyplane research dept.)

"It's from Private Ryan...Wish you were here."