Wall Street Worrier Gifts

GPS Shoes

"This 10000 Dow thing hasn't been the pure ecstasy I thought..."

'George has us well diversified. We own every stock in the Misfortune 500.'

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

I.T. Fear

"All we have to fear is fear itself and unmet quarterly projections."

'The reason I like this guy's stock picks is, he's not burdened by having any experience in finance whatsoever.'

Jumping Wall Street.

"What's wrong, boy? Has Google's stock gone down?!"

I hate monday mornings.

'Why do I get the impression that my 401(k) isn't performing well.'

Typical...the weather is lousy all week...then on the weekend it's too sunny to work.

'Don't mind him. He gets this wa every time they start talking about the inverse relationship between bond yields and prices.'

'I don't know about you, but I really don't like the look of that yield curve.'

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

A poem: With daylight's shift, winter draws near...

'A few days away from those sharks on Wall Street will make all the difference.'

US Economy: 'Wow! What a beautiful sight!'

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

'If congress regulates obscene bonuses, isn't that a violation of the first amendment?'

Wall Street has a one way arrow upwards.

Shares Nosedive

I think I have a gilt complex.

'We may not agree on the stock market, but we're both Chicago fans.'

Humpty Dumpty on Wall Street.

'Don't blame me, turkey - I've never been near Wall Street.'

"Today opened as November 10, 1987, swung wildly to March 7, 1996, and closed as December 5, 1902."

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

Insecurity hits Wall Street

"The accounting change that contributed most to the quarter was adding three zeros to the revenue number."

It's 10 p.m. Do you know how low your investment banking stocks can go?

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

New York Stock Exchange. Wall St. To err is human, but this is ridiculous!

Weather reporter feels guilty every time it rains.

"We have to recognise that severe weather events are becoming more common. . ."