Tech Worrier Gifts

'I'm worried, the software that can replace me is becoming more affordable.'

'He spent yesterday being briefed on the threats from a cyber attack...'

"Why don't you go outside and get some fresh air?"

'Couldn't you just leave that here until we're sure the new system works?'

We know your e-mail address!

"If you're so worried about the effect of your mobile phone on your sperm count maybe you should just use it less!"

'No the computer has not been 'hacked by terrorists', you've got the Caps Lock on.'

'Mobile phone scare' "Hello?HELLO?"

Radiation Babe

"My smart-phone has big ears. . . we have one little quarrel. . . and I start getting pop-up-ads for counselling therapy."

"I thought I'd gotten away with it, but with technology's advancements it's only a matter of time before they find out about that term paper I plagiarized."

"No, no, don't crash. . . I forgot to save my document!"

"All we have to fear is fear itself and unmet quarterly projections."

I.T. Fear

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

I hate monday mornings.

'Being a nobody isn't so bad...You don't have to worry about becoming a has-been.'

Typical...the weather is lousy all week...then on the weekend it's too sunny to work.

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

Weather reporter feels guilty every time it rains.

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

"We have to recognise that severe weather events are becoming more common. . ."

'Climate change seems to be a real thing... in the past, our money was sufficient till the 25th of a month. Nowadays, it's melted away on the 15th.'

'D'you ever get that uncanny feeling we're not being watched.'

"With rain in nearly every forecast, probably because of global warming, you know what's coming...so officially, we are now News & Sports at Six."

"Hurry up and pick that lock. I'm hungry and it's freezing out here."

"Is it always so cloudy?"

"But you said that to make it start, I had to 'Boot it up'!"

'One question. Now that death's over and done with, do I still have to worry about taxes?'

'Read that part again where it predicts a cold, snowy winter for the midwest...'

"The boss complimented Bob today... but now he's afraid if he talks to him again he'll say something stupid and ruin it!"

"Sorry Brian, bit of a rush this morning - I've left my face in the car."

Energy Bills