Volatility Vanguard Gifts

He's back on the ledge again! He sold everything, and the market went 'back up.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"We made all the wheels out of old coffee tables and chandeliers."

Science Fair. How viruses spread.

We're going on a first date. So many words are misused every day. Literally! I don't accept the use of imperfect language. Me either. Trying to fight it has no effect. It's all a mute point. Irregardless, I could care less. I had nothing farther to say.

'Time to buy.'

"These new variants are triggering my impostor syndrome."

"Did you read my review on Amazon? Four out of four people found it helpful."

Spontaneous Kombucha

'It's a deal. You don't infect me, and I don't infect you.'

Cafe investors: I'd like your support in acquiring the lemonade stand down the street. By cutting redundant labor, marketing and technology. I place our annual savings at $17 billion. The phone company investors bought it. Can monkey lick your head?

'Sometimes, from time to time, occasionally I wish I'd never bought that ruddy thesaurus!'

"We can be old-timey office workers for Halloween."

"How could you forget where you buried dad. You do know he has the car keys in his pocket?"

Catastrophe Risk Insurance

"Who's on duty today...you or me?"

'In today's action, the Dow Jones Industrial Average cratered, then soared, then swooned, then skyrocketed, then plummeted, then rebounded, and finally threw up.'

'It's definitely human flu. Sound the alarm!'

'Thank you but I'm a bit sensitive to ethnic food.'

Seats on the Stock Exhange are now equppied with air bags

Music Freak.

DOW Industrial Average.

Collapse of 'Corner Men'

"What do you think? Too Edward Gorey?"

"You're dated look is an absolute tour de force."

"This is where I keep my entire music collection."

"You said 'give me a cool hairstyle...' You never specified which decade."

Mary Quant.

Stock Market Bear.

"Next!"

Bell Bottom Pants

Inclusion of the word coronavirus in dictionary

"Biggest damn virus I've ever seen."

Doomsday Clock.

'The shame of that Garbo woman-wearing MY dress!'