Visiting Art Exhibits Gifts

"I collect art. Or trash, depending on your point of view."

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"Well....I could've done this!"

It's a call from Tate modern.

Art Gallery.

"I like it, honey ... it speaks to what a waste of time your MFA was."

'I agree, this artist will go far and he should start right now!'

'It's like a piece of music, like Mozart or Beethoven.'

"I could do that."

Congratulations! - You have been nominated for the Turner Prize...

"Do I need to know this stuff to get into medical school?"

'I may not know much about art. But, I don't know what I like either.'

'Personally, I don't question these things. My snout period will simply end when it ends.'

"Apparently he only uses fugitive colours."

"Who's the artist?"

"Is that all you can say - 'It's not messy'?"

Elvis Presley buying a ticket to art show saying "One for the Monet"

Unfinished Masterpiece.

Tilted painting

His new 'Absence of Anything' reminds me strangely of his earlier blank 'Nothing to Say' canvasses."

"In this piece, the price clearly does not reflect what the artist is trying to say."

"But all it's playing is Mussorgsky's 'pictures at an exhibition'."

"Apparently, he had occasional sober periods."

Tracey Emin - Private view.

"I like it. Just trying to imagine how it would look in my yoga studio."

"It's taken her years to develop that naive, spontaneous, style."

'Oh, I think I know exactly what the artist is saying. He's saying; 'With a bit of luck, some idiot will buy this junk'!'

"C'mon dude, these are not your people."

'I'm really a painter and decorator - I only do this to pay the bills.'

Whistler exhibition - "I trust you will have some apposite comments to make eh, Ruskin?

"I suffer for my art..."

"So you're an investor who dabbles in art? I happen to be an artist who dabbles in money."

"I'm expected to write a good review of this stuff... So here I go with some confusing art rhetoric."

I paint landscapes to cleanse my palette.

"I like it, it takes me back to my childhood."