Visiting A Psychic Gifts

'I can see a visit to the vet, but, oh my, no more kids after that!...'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

The Environmentalist

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"The sweater you knit him will be thrown out in February."

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

"Why bother?"

Asking out a palm reader.

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

'... And this is Goldsmith, our futures consultant.'

Quantum Psychic

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

"I'm not sure you'll want to know this."

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

"You're solemates!"

Channelling on the Cheap

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

Card Reader in PC Supplies Store.

Using psychic powers, the final exam had been a breeze. However, Madame Evetta did not realize that the student in front of her from who she had obtained the majority of her answers, was Bugs Higgins.

Madame ZuZu. Dream Interpretation. Tarot. Palms. She says the dream where I'm taking a test naked means I barely made it through school.

'If I'd known these programs were going to be so fake - I'd be psychic!'

'I see you in five years from now, you're still coming to see me. Do you want me to book the appointments in advance?'

Pie Filling Reader

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

Psychic to Leylandii tree - 'You will reach great heights.'

"Did you have a cat?"

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

Roy, if you can hear me, the Mets are twenty games over .500 and they have a good shot at clinching the N. L. East."

..and with our new spirit website you can keep in touch with all your dead friends!

"It will be all your fault."

'You're going on a long journey. Have you got an OAP's bus pass?'