Virtual Scholar Gifts

'I was working on my online degree, until my computer went on sabbatical.'

'Irwin graduates from an online course today.'

K9 Literati

Mr Jones is not seeing anyone in person. Do you have a webcam?

Romans.

"He walked in, said he was a visiting scholar, and made himself at home."

"I'm charging you with texting and driving."

"Cheer up, might never happen!"

'I blog, therefore I am.'

'Why is there a 'Like' button but no 'Despise' button?'

"Not the 'Princeton Experience' he was expecting."

Modern Studying

Tiddles completes his doctorate.

'I've deleted my on-line homework teacher three times but he won't go away.'

"We don't communicate any more..."

'I haven't been in any academic journals but I do get my Tweets re-Tweeted a lot.'

"Remote teaching isn't good for torturing a substitute. For that you need a live audience."

"Distance Learning"

"If you retweet it and you have '0' followers, was it retweeted?"

"Okay scouts, that ends today's online soldering session!"

"Yethhh, hello. . .are you clothed?"

'What the...?!' 404 ERROR!

It's often meant as a compliment, but in this case saying he's "in a class by himself" is not a good thing.

"Why do I have to go to school? Why can't I just log onto their website when I get up?"

Homeschooling during lockdown

"O.K. Kindergarten friends, let's sing together... 'If you're happy and you know it - and you've washed your hands for at least 20 seconds and you've squirted some sanitizer on them - clap your hands.'"

I see you coing under a lot of strains

'Ever since she got that MBA on the Internet, she's been impossible to live with.'

'All of my degrees are from on-line universities. I guess that makes me a man of e-mails rather than of letters.'

Worst Zoom Meeting Ever.

'College textbooks sure are expensive. Luckily, I saved a fortune by using eTexts. Now I have to see if I can buy used eTexts.'

'I can't use the webcam, mother. Being Christmas morning my server is down.'

'You can cancel my appointment. My computer reached him!'

"Do you mind if I call you 'Rayna the Robot?'"

"If a man tweets and it doesn't appear in anybody's timeline, is it still a tweet?"