Virtual Interaction Pillows

"The isolation, loneliness and despair can only satisfy for so long."

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"Mom, please shake my chair. I'm taking a virtual school bus ride before class begins."

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

Mac OS 20

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

Text Culture

"Global warming is a great icebreaker."

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

I'm not good with names but never forget a face. Of course, that's not very useful right now.

"Pokemon...Pokemon...Pokemon...."

Glance Exchange

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

Real Life/Surreal Life

"Will follow you on social media for food."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"Wanna toss the ol' virtual pigskin?"

Mr Jones is not seeing anyone in person. Do you have a webcam?

"You may now kiss the bride."

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

"And lastly, for my infinite perseverance, self-control and fortitude, I'd like to thank the Internet trolls."

'You're good with people. Just tell him to go fuck himself.'

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

'Jeff is a tackle on his online college football team.'

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

Life after death

'Mr. Smithdon's at his desk, but he's not really there....He's somewhere out there in cyberspace!'

Go Play Outside - it's so real, you kids will almost smell the virtual fresh air!

"He is walking from 'Lands end to John'o'Groats', virtually."

'Dewey, come look! This is so cute. The kids are playing wii hockey.'

'These virtual-reality goggles are great! Right now, I'm sun-bathing in Tahiti...'

The virtual wine tasting was a big success

"Social media stocks have taken a beating I'm seeing a lot of avatars on ledges."

'With your technical background I know you're familiar with virtual reality. We'll teach you virtueless reality.'