Virtual Chef T-Shirts

'Needs salt!'

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

"Where did you say you went to culinary school?"

'Of course it's high in protein. Just look at this!'

Gone out...here is a computer simulation of your dinner

First there were virtual-pets. Now there are virtual owners and ranchers.

'...now pour the mixture into a baking dish...'

"We upped the protein by simply factoring in the permissible level of insect parts."

"I'm not eating a TV dinner. Now it's called 'Computer Cuisine.'"

Microwave confusion.

"How am I supposed to cook? The internet is down."

'I can't make dinner right now - I'm installing new software.'

My Cauldron Rules

"Since I've been using this organic stuff my potions are far more effective."

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

"The food was terrible, but my wife said it photographed well."

'Thanksgiving dinner will be ready some time in February.'

"Your dinner is at www.Icouldntbearsed.com."

"Well, we went through the fruit and veg, and thought we should try something more exotic - like the space-time continuum."

"I don't care how much I own – there's still something unsatisfying about digital Girl Scout Thin Mints."

"What're you doing for Thanksgiving, little buddy?" "Having a huge party." "It'll be full of turkey, cranberry sauce, wine, eggnog, football, and friends and family who love me dearly." "Oh, good. I was afraid you'd be alone all day playing video games." "'Turkey Slaughter VI' is no ordinary game." "You're coming to my place."

'I want my stir fry to be magical.'

'Your tests indicate that you have a very short attention span -- you should be either a short-order cook or a news anchorman.'

Cook and PC

Cowpat Man.

"It' a big important dinner on short notice, but luckily we have a pressure cooker...me."

'I downloaded these recipes. Care to try virtual meatloaf?'

"You know that no one playing that farm game can see you, right?"

"Now that's what I call a deep dish pizza!"

'This is iDiet, the fanziest restaurant in town. They've got virtual food only.'

"I never thought I'd be so happy to see friends foodstagramming their restaurant meals."

Jim checks his breadbox inbox.