Virtual Chef Gifts

"The dishes in your cook book look delicious. You must be a great cook."

'Needs salt!'

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

'Of course it's high in protein. Just look at this!'

"Where did you say you went to culinary school?"

Gone out...here is a computer simulation of your dinner

"I'm not eating a TV dinner. Now it's called 'Computer Cuisine.'"

First there were virtual-pets. Now there are virtual owners and ranchers.

'...now pour the mixture into a baking dish...'

"We upped the protein by simply factoring in the permissible level of insect parts."

Microwave confusion.

"How am I supposed to cook? The internet is down."

'I can't make dinner right now - I'm installing new software.'

Gross! Get you external hard drive off the dinner table!

My Cauldron Rules

"Since I've been using this organic stuff my potions are far more effective."

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

"The food was terrible, but my wife said it photographed well."

'Thanksgiving dinner will be ready some time in February.'

"Your dinner is at www.Icouldntbearsed.com."

"Well, we went through the fruit and veg, and thought we should try something more exotic - like the space-time continuum."

"I don't care how much I own – there's still something unsatisfying about digital Girl Scout Thin Mints."

'George will be dining with us via Skype.'

'I want my stir fry to be magical.'

"What're you doing for Thanksgiving, little buddy?" "Having a huge party." "It'll be full of turkey, cranberry sauce, wine, eggnog, football, and friends and family who love me dearly." "Oh, good. I was afraid you'd be alone all day playing video games." "'Turkey Slaughter VI' is no ordinary game." "You're coming to my place."

'Your tests indicate that you have a very short attention span -- you should be either a short-order cook or a news anchorman.'

'I downloaded these recipes. Care to try virtual meatloaf?'

Cowpat Man.

Cook and PC

"It' a big important dinner on short notice, but luckily we have a pressure cooker...me."

"You know that no one playing that farm game can see you, right?"

"Now that's what I call a deep dish pizza!"

"Stop saying, 'BAM!' every time you add something to the frickin' brew."

'This is iDiet, the fanziest restaurant in town. They've got virtual food only.'

"I never thought I'd be so happy to see friends foodstagramming their restaurant meals."