Virtual Assistant Pillows

"Is your Zoom background literally a photo of the front room when it was tidy?"

"I'll have my people zoom your people."

'Of course working in a 'Virtual Firm' does have it's drawbacks...'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

In basket-case.

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"Morning, all!"

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

Good Luck!

Shake it all about sign on desk

"This never happened."

Should've been routine. That was before the dog called and offered to pay twice as much to have the master put down.

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

"Fill it up!"

"Call my broker, fax my accountant, and get my groove back."

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

Dog with saucepan stuck on its head

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

"....how many kids have we got now?"

'The vet said that getting spayed might hurt a little. But having nine puppies hurt a little, too.'

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

A clerk asking for time off to get married.

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

In - Out - Pending.

"Do you have an appointment?"

"Larry, what's the weather forecast?" "Let me ask you something. Did you make waffles this morning? Because someone had maple syrup on their hands, and I seem to recall a hand moving me... a pretty, pretty, pretty sticky hand..."

"I think I'm beginning to embrace humiliation."

Not much money, glory, or praise

InIn by-products.