Virtual Assistant Pillows

"Is your Zoom background literally a photo of the front room when it was tidy?"

"I'll have my people zoom your people."

'Of course working in a 'Virtual Firm' does have it's drawbacks...'

"Hey Jeff! Your breath stinks. Also, I've ordered you some new underwear."

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

In basket-case.

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

"Morning, all!"

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

Good Luck!

"This never happened."

Shake it all about sign on desk

Should've been routine. That was before the dog called and offered to pay twice as much to have the master put down.

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

Dog with saucepan stuck on its head

"Fill it up!"

"Call my broker, fax my accountant, and get my groove back."

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

"....how many kids have we got now?"

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

InIn by-products.

A clerk asking for time off to get married.

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

'The vet said that getting spayed might hurt a little. But having nine puppies hurt a little, too.'

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

"I think I'm beginning to embrace humiliation."

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

"Do you have an appointment?"

In - Out - Pending.

Not much money, glory, or praise