Vintage Story Reader Gifts

Little Bo-Peep searching for her sheep.

Gen-Next Library

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

Tarzan of the damn dirty apes.

"I'm just saying, maybe we wouldn't need the swords if we didn't wear these clothes."

"I believe it was called 'cursive'."

"First they came for the horoscope and the crossword and I did nothing. Then they came for the cartoonists and there was no-one left to satirise it."

Pirates: "To absent Limbs."

'I don't like reading on screen, so I'm printing the internet to look at it later.'

Alice in Wonderland - The Pig Baby.

"Me Tarzan. You CGI."

A vicar is reading 'The Great Begatsby' written by Abraham.

'Bront?saurus.'

William Tell

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"

Mr. Stryver at Tellson's Bank

"Javert" Would Like To Use Your Current Location

Nanki Poo

Jane Austen

"I dropped my goblet!"

Books*. *Batteries not included.

'What are you staring at? . . . Please save me from the English majors.'

"You'd like a book by Shakespeare? Certainly sir - which one. . .?"

"It's Shakespeare, Mother - please do't keep moaning 'Oh get on with it'!"

'Gretel, she's lying. It's not gluten free!'

A new meaning in the Roman

"The forest has been cleared, Little Red Riding Hood has gone because her grandma is now buying her stuff online and you're asking me why I started drinking? Seriously?"

'My battery is dead. How does it end?'

"You're a surprisingly good kisser for having two different dead guys' lips."

Trilby - 'Hast thou found me, o mine enemy?'

"Books are tricky. You can't text with a text book and you can't call with a phone book!"

'Oh darling, it is not an ibook, it is only a book.'

". . . And I tell you that Sir Walter Raleigh used his OWN coat."

My aunt astonishes me

"Hi Honey, I'm Holmes"