Vintage Comedy Lover Gifts

"You can stop any time, sir. I've already told you I'm not wearing a body camera!"

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

"Congratulations, you've passed."

"Of course I look revolting, but I've got a pre-Thatcher sperm count."

'Today's speech is available on cassette, and I just know you'll all want to buy one!'

'You ate the centerpiece,clodpate.'

'You're an arms salesman?'

'That will be all Perkins - you can put her down now. . .'

"Say, Pop, do you realize the average child spends approximately fifteen dollars a year on candy?"

The Reserve Forces.

Study of an elderly female hailing the last omblebus.

Fat man asking for something that would carry him and stable keeper suggesting an omnibus

"Stop snickering at my retro iconography."

"Not that it really matters, but how will this play out among the serfs?"

"Tell me, what did you do in real life?"

"They certainly wouldn't fool me."

"Er – if you young people don't mind, I have a few things to do now. Perhaps you have a hotel or somewhere to go?"

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

Primitive magician

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'Sigh! So that's what love is all about...'

'The village's oldest inhabitant? We did have one, but he died.'

Two men toting a dog in a carriage by foot, while the dog sticks his head out the window.

"I'd like you to see an Anthropologist.''

'Who said the Germans don't have a sense of humour? Just look at that card Hans Greber and we have haven't been shot at all day.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Moscow 1917

"He reports to Grand Central Palace tomorrow."

"It's time you had those dinosaur hips replaced."

Vaudeville producers audition a singing Canada goose.

"It's overdosed on Parakeetamol."

"Let that breathe a little. But not too much. My last bottle hyperventilated."

"Ooops is a bit of an understatement, don't you think Cardigan?"

A man selling a horse to an older lady

'How kids really saw Mr Robinson in computer classes.'

'I'll wait for Harold one more year. He hasn't crossed the finish line yet from the 1932 Olympic's marathon.'