Video Store Explorer Gifts

'He wanted to know if anyone had ever brought out a keep-fat video.'

No Elgar!

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

What can I get you? An explanation for why we haven't gone back to the moon. Would you like the rational explanation or the Youtube explanation? Rational would be lovely, please. Ok. We never went back to the moon because there was no reason to. The whole point of Apollo was to reassure the free world that we could beat the Soviet Union. Mission accomplished. Oh ... that's it? Well, that's rather bland. Could I exchange that for the Youtube explanation? The lizard-men who live on the film set wh

'Why would a just God allow so many teenage vampire movies?'

'This snuff video you sold me just shows people taking snuff.'

Danger Noodle tho bored

Videos. Classics. DVD. Blu-Ray. No, Ernie, "Jason and the Argonauts" is not about fans of the movie "Argo."

Stud Finders: 'These don't even work!'

'I just asked if you were finding everything alright. I never said I worked here.'

"It's a new policy, sir. . . you have to be wither under fourteen or over fifty to rent Jerry Lewis movies."

I was just watching a Youtube video called "How a Lack of Bird Poop Proved the Big Bang." It wan about how removing all sources of interference from a huge radiation detector led to the discovery of cosmic background radiation. They'd removed everything that might've been messing up the readings, and the last thing they removed was bird droppings. Then they knew the signals were real, and from space. I'm gonna have to watch that for myself, I'm not sure you've got all the details right. I was di

Video Rentals Sales. Do you have movies about robots and computers? The chip flicks are over there!

'Dirty, lesbian, whore, bitch, gang bangs turned out to be Finding Nemo!'

'Busy day?'

"The DVD you want is on my right earlobe."

"Babe, I'm tired of staying in and watching Netflix every night. How much is Hulu?"

"If we ain't got it, it ain't worth watching"

"It's one of those large print audiobooks."

Stubborn Al's Video

"Let's see if I can find you something sexy for Valentine's Day."

"When it comes to blowing leaves around uselessly and creating an insane amount of noise, this model can't be beat."

Soul Music

Sadie, I just saw that the "great flood" myths are based on reality. You "saw"? On Youtube. It was a video called "The Advanced Pre Ice Age Civilizations that Vanished from Earth." The guy pointed out that the last ice age ended 12,000-ish years ago. And when it ended, huge ice caps that were two miles deep melted and flooded much of the world. And then he laid out a bunch of other evidence having to do with maps and artifacts and something or other. "Something or other"? Well, yeah, at around t

Former Print Journalists Lost Their Jobs to TV and the Internet. Guess Where They're Talking (But For Free?)

Bed, Bath and Beyond.

Man in video store sees video entitled: 'Police, violence, camera, legal action.'

Pop-up shop...

'I'm encouraging him to read.'

'Not sure if that comes in your size. Let's see if I can find someone who cares.'

'You should concentrate on getting a first one.'