Vet Gifts

"Is there any chance of getting my testicles back?"

'First of all, calm down - your allowed to be on the couch.'

'You see, Doctor, we've never had any children...

'That's odd. For most people, getting a pet helps lower blood pressure.'

"She's not all over you, but she gets the job done."

is it an emergency?

I'm having trouble breathing.

"And when the time comes the company will put you to sleep at its own expense."

'Cat scans are for felines. I will give your dog a pet scan.'

'But hey, who am I to complain?'

'Always give a grave prognosis, my boy!...'

'This is one sick dog.'

YOUR HORSE - Poster style outlining horse parts.

'Bovine Palpation'

'Yesterday we ran a CBC, a BUN, a liver profile...

'First the good news: he has 3 excellent legs.'

'Enough about my worms, tell me about your fleas.'

Balloon Animal Vaccinations

Liquid mice.

Balding dog

'You guys are real friends!'

'I've run every labroratory test in the book and I'm happy to tell you that everything came out normal. There's nothing wrong with the bull."

'Seven birthday cakes a year is playing havoc with your cholesterol.'

'Doctor, your glasses!'

'This is one sick dog!'

'I think I'm going deaf - I can't hear the horse whisperer.'

Hamster on dialysis machine 'In my day we'd have had him put down.'

'We did a catscan on him and we still don't know why they purr.'

'Yes, we DO have a special price for breeders. Ten percent more than anybody else!"

"You were a veterinarian? Would you take a look at my left wing?"

"Good news—it's not colon cancer, it's tinsel."

'...I'm one os those wrinkled Shar Pei breeds, but I had Botox injections.'

'Do you have anything for Restless Tail Syndrome?'

"I'm afraid it's curiosity."

"He's very persuasive ... "