Ventriloquism Fan Gifts

"We never talk anymore."

(For years, Stella pretended to sleep as her master practiced his ventriloquism.)

Donald, The Amazing Vivektriloquist

"Azure! Your eyes are like limpid pools of azure."

Dummy Cutter

A cow ventriloquist.

"Yes, son, it's true. You were adopted."

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

Doctor to patient: 'While I'm back here, let's try a little something I learned when I was a ventriloquist.'

"Personally, I of course loved Uncle Clarence, but Mr. Quibbles wants to say a few things."

Bride with a ventriloquist's dummy.

Chuck didn't care what his therapist said; that is not where he left his dummy.

"You'll regret saying that, I'll get my own back in tomorrow's performance - you'll never work again!"

Ventriloquist Grave

Decaying corpse

'The dog ate my homework but it can be presented nonetheless because he's a passable ventriloquist.'

'I see the critics say I need a new partner.'

Ventriloquist Audition

"I told you we should have had separate trials."

'David, can't you speak for yourself?'

'My 'friend' has this problem, Doctor!'

Shipwrecked Ventriloquist.

"The big one dropped his weapon, but keep an eye on the little one. I think he's still armed."

"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."

Ways to Misuse Ventriloquism

Musician

"No, I didn't just tell you to have one yourself!"

Ventriloquism For Beginners.

"Looks like you both suffer from IBS. You...irritable bowel. Your friend...irritable burl."

"So. Are you a mime, a puppeteer, or a ventriloquist?"

"Last chance, or Max here has ways of making you talk."

An Early Ventriloquist Meets His Future Dummy

'Thanks for buying the ventriloquism instructional tapes. You are now listening to tape number one...'

Jellyfish ventriloquists,