Ventriloquism Antics Gifts

"He's a terrible drunk."

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

Doctor to patient: 'While I'm back here, let's try a little something I learned when I was a ventriloquist.'

"Personally, I of course loved Uncle Clarence, but Mr. Quibbles wants to say a few things."

Bride with a ventriloquist's dummy.

Ventriloquist Grave

A cow ventriloquist.

"You'll regret saying that, I'll get my own back in tomorrow's performance - you'll never work again!"

Chuck didn't care what his therapist said; that is not where he left his dummy.

'The dog ate my homework but it can be presented nonetheless because he's a passable ventriloquist.'

'I see the critics say I need a new partner.'

"I told you we should have had separate trials."

Ventriloquist Audition

When Ventriloquists get the hiccups.

'David, can't you speak for yourself?'

"Looks like you both suffer from IBS. You...irritable bowel. Your friend...irritable burl."

Ventriloquism For Beginners.

Ways to Misuse Ventriloquism

'My 'friend' has this problem, Doctor!'

"No, I didn't just tell you to have one yourself!"

"The big one dropped his weapon, but keep an eye on the little one. I think he's still armed."

"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."

"We never talk anymore."

"So. Are you a mime, a puppeteer, or a ventriloquist?"

Shipwrecked Ventriloquist.

Sorry, I'm already spoken for.

"Last chance, or Max here has ways of making you talk."

An Early Ventriloquist Meets His Future Dummy

'Thanks for buying the ventriloquism instructional tapes. You are now listening to tape number one...'

Ventriloquist's Doll also has a Doll.

"NOBODY LISTENS ANYMORE."

Ventriloquism For Beginners

Jellyfish ventriloquists,

"I'm sorry Muggzy, but I'm taking the deal and turning state's witness."