Vegetable Virtuosos T-Shirts

'Grow you son of a bitch!'

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

Allotment

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

Our farmer brought fresh beans, tomatoes, corn and squash this week. Nice. You should have bought into the farm share. I've got my own farmer. Mine's cheap. Mine's cheaper. Thanks, mom. You can't take more zucchini?

'Looks like Reginald wasn't kidding when he said he's going to start urban farming on the roof...'

Frank & Ernie's Carrot, Beet, Potato Farm. Lunch break's over --- Shall we return to our roots?

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

"I can't make it out - on the packet it said radishes."

Excellent crop! What's your secret?

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….

Veggie Hall of Fame.

'What did I say about finishing your vegetables, Billy?'

'Who says you're not genetically manipulated?'

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

Rap-scallions

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

A butcher announcing he will kill his own meat

Onion Tears

Avocado Timeline

'He's all eyes!'

'Do I have to give thanks for all the spinach, or just the bite I'm going to eat?'

"The vegetables have gone bad!"

"Are you mad with us, Mrs. Bimmelman?"

"Mother will never be able to rest on her laurels. If they're green, she'll cook them."

'I grow all our tomatoes. I grow all our spinach. All you do is complain about the cost of my twice weekly manicures.'

"I told the cook I would prefer that she use some kind of artificial blackbird substitute."

'Eat your lettuce. It'll put colour back in your cheeks.'

'Carrot salad, carrot casserole, carrot juice, carrot cake - I want steak!'

'Ooh girl, he may look like a potato, but he moves like a yam!'

'This pea is the first vegetable that I've ever grown so I would like to have it stuffed and mounted.'