Vegetable Vigilante Enthusiast Gifts

Oh no - Vegelanties !

Allotment

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

Advocado

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

Our farmer brought fresh beans, tomatoes, corn and squash this week. Nice. You should have bought into the farm share. I've got my own farmer. Mine's cheap. Mine's cheaper. Thanks, mom. You can't take more zucchini?

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

Frank & Ernie's Carrot, Beet, Potato Farm. Lunch break's over --- Shall we return to our roots?

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….

Excellent crop! What's your secret?

A butcher announcing he will kill his own meat

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

Onion Tears

"Relax. They're just crows."

Rap-scallions

Vegetarian Birthdays.

Pea

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

Avocado Timeline

'Needs more kale.'

Runner Bean...

'Radford, go in for Bloom. ... Uh-uh-uh! Finish your vegetables first!'

Tree's Tree Nursery. Get this. Dad is selling those goofy upside-down tomato planters. What idiot would buy them? Thanks! I'll let you know how it works! My idiotic bio teacher.

"Are you mad with us, Mrs. Bimmelman?"

Vegetarian Restaurant: Choose Your Own Cabbage

'Not here, Fred.'

"I think we can take you off the cabbage diet now"

"Jersey Tomatoes" vs. "Jersey toMAHtoes"

"Mother will never be able to rest on her laurels. If they're green, she'll cook them."

You mixed your DNA with that of a carrot? I've created a giant loud-mouthed left-leaning vegetable. Some would say that's redundant. Very funny. It's worse that that. The carrot doesn't share just my politics … You smell beautiful, like ranch dressing on a spring day. I do like a tall vegetable.