Vegetable Enthusiast Pillows

The Perfect Garden.

Marrow transplants

'So much for the theory that carrots will make you see better!'

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.

'We appreciate your concern, but as I've told you multiple times, Mr Turnip, youn just can't help us.'

'Son, it's time we told you. There are some people in this world who don't LIKE brussels sprouts...'

'Don't be mad, I'm just following your instructions.'

'Can't we have onions instead? I'm sick of leeks.'

"I don't really hate vegetables...but they're my last line of defense before liver and onions."

"Why are you ploughing with a steam roller?" "I'm growing mashed potatoes."

"Of course our GM vegetables are safe, Madam, they told us so themselves!"

"If I get too warm, I can always take a couple of layers off."

"Broccoli? Sometimes, Bill, I don't like what you bring to the table."

North woman sells frozen vegetables.

'You might want to lay off the carrots.'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'I have to be very careful when I eat...my Mother sneaks carrots into everything.'

-What did the carrot say to the onion? -What? -Nothing, vegetables don't talk!

'Yeah, my bad eyesight is probably due to too much reading in the dark...'

Rabbit gives carrot as gift.

"No cannabis up 'ere Sarge - just courgettes and lettuce."

Sweet potatoes...

"We're presenting this year's award to the tomato—for the way he has deepened our understanding of world-conflict resolution, for fostering the ideals of peace, friendship, and international brotherhood, and for being delicious."

"Quick! It's the 45 minutes a year when tomatoes taste incredible!"

"That's not fair. I do not only visit you once a year on National Asparagus Day."

"Nobody thinks you're Bob Dylan."

A rabbit peeling a carrot before he eats it.

Forbidden Vegetable

"No mold or rot, so we're good for another year."

"Ma'am, would you like a month's worth of corn absolutely free?" "That's right, beans for just 10¢ a carton." "We'll even switch your onions for you!"

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

When vegetables flirt

Artichoke Activist

A Country Boy Throws a Turnip at the Squire.

"Next time I'm feeling low remind me how silly asparagi look while they grow."