Vegetable Connoisseur Gifts

Man of refinement trying to teach a street salesman to say 'asparagus' rather than 'sparrow-grass'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

Allotment

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

Advocado

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"I come here for the pepper."

See you at the farmers market!

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

"What do you call a person who only eats corn?"

'Pigs feet, sir?' 'Are they pickled?'

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

Full English Breakfast.

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

A burgandy from when the dow hit a record high.

Excellent crop! What's your secret?

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

"Regular service or affected?"

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground