Food Connoisseur Gifts

'How local is this.'

'Buying ice cream off the internet seemed like a good idea at the time.'

"Muffy has gone to a whole new level of analyzing her food before turning her nose up at it."

Gentrification of the Fridge.

'Personally, I've always liked Bordeaux with my Swiss.'

'I don't want to eat this. I want to eat organic foods.'

Kitchen chef

"Would you like a professional critique of your orders?"

Premium shopper compared to a value shopper.

"I think this would pair nicely with a decent Cabernet Sauvignon!"

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

"Well yes, I did say pizza with everything..."

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'This is my uncle Harry: He made his fortune sniffing for truffles in France...'

'French onion soup. Hold the soup.'

He'll have a crumb of wheat toast. No I won't! I'll have a sausage biscuit with cheese. And we'll have a plain glass of water. No I won't! I'll have a mocha with whipped cream. And for dessert … I'll have a hot buttered blueberry scone with pumpkin-spice frosting and peppermint sprinkles! That looks lovely! He'll have plain yogurt. If you don't eat right, you won't be around for me to berate. Give me a double donut burger! A triple would be more humane. House of Java.

"By any chance do you have brioche?"

"No thanks. I had a cracker in April."

"Do you want the rest of this mouse? It tastes gamey to me."

"Regular service or affected?"

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Counting ribs

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

"I come here for the pepper."