Vegetable Buyer Gifts

"He's our man in Brussels. . ."

Apples for sale

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

Advocado

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

"I hope we can sell everything before it's time for mom to make dinner."

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

Vegetarian Birthdays.

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

Typical...the weather is lousy all week...then on the weekend it's too sunny to work.

Pea

'Needs more kale.'

Runner Bean...

Tree's Tree Nursery. Get this. Dad is selling those goofy upside-down tomato planters. What idiot would buy them? Thanks! I'll let you know how it works! My idiotic bio teacher.

Vegetarian Restaurant: Choose Your Own Cabbage

'Radford, go in for Bloom. ... Uh-uh-uh! Finish your vegetables first!'

'Not here, Fred.'

"I think we can take you off the cabbage diet now"

"Jersey Tomatoes" vs. "Jersey toMAHtoes"

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious day when you're ripe and not yet mealy?"

Forbidden Vegetable

'Then again, who says we can't call it a mangelwurzel?'

You mixed your DNA with that of a carrot? I've created a giant loud-mouthed left-leaning vegetable. Some would say that's redundant. Very funny. It's worse that that. The carrot doesn't share just my politics … You smell beautiful, like ranch dressing on a spring day. I do like a tall vegetable.

Untold Love Stories "Beauty and the Beets". We think you would be more beautiful if you dyed your hair a purplish red.

Artichoking victim

"In my previous life I was arugula."

Cheeky boy and putting 'leeks' sign on toilet.

Pumpkin Time!

Today: Tomato Surprise. Of course the tomato surprise doesn't impress you, sir … You’re not a tomato.

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

"That's not fair. I do not only visit you once a year on National Asparagus Day."

"I'm pleased to say our dishes all have too much kale."

F&E Produce. I had interesting customers today. First, a beautician checked out the purple potatoes and yellow beets. Ah, a hair stylist inspected the colored roots! That card shark bought some fruit. Two pears, I'll bet! A journalist was searching for an onion alternative. He needs leeks! And labor negotiators requested to increase their usual vegetable order. They asked for a celery hike, eh? I think the customers are the best part of this job. Yeah, you never know who will turnip!