Vegan Seeker Gifts

'We do not discuss soybeans on these premises, Mrs. Grommet.'

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

Who should be the next eco-club president? The most vegan? The most carbon neutral? The most into solar? Eco-club. But we need someone who will attract kids to the environmental cause. Then it's obvious. The most popular. Or most athletic!

What's In Her Bag? Coachella Edition!

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

"You had me at alternative milk."

"Dig in. It's a medallion-of-veal look-alike."

'It's the LAST time I volunteer to organise the staff Christmas meal, I've spent three days trying to find a 'traditional' lacto-vegan Christmas menu.'

'Smile and say: tofu-based dairy substitute.'

"It's natural, vegan organic, no additives, preservatives or cooking."

"After going vegan, replacing all the animal heads just made sense.'

"Repeat after me... We are vegan... We are vegan..."

'Ok, best two geniuses out of three.'

'VEGETARIAN ZOMBIES' colour

"Wow yes, it's a lovely garden, but I can only see flowers: not a carrot in sight..."

No Dogs Allowed

'Now you tell me you've gone vegan?'

'It's your lucky day. I just went vegan.'

"This place has the best vegan nachos!"

'Not only do you get out of cooking tonight, but you found a place with a lazy chef too.'

"Cool, I've never met a vegan flamingo before."

"There were days he could kill for a piece of tofu."

Free Range / Deranged

"No fog lips, rat guts or bat teeth? I hate going vegan!"

'Poppy - I have no issue with you being a Bi-polar, celibate vegan. It's just that your Aura's the wrong colour.'

After rescue from Treasure Island, Benn Gunn returned to his wife, Mary, a strict vegan.

"There's no such thing as a vegan flytrap."

"Everyone, stop looking delicious. The vegans are back and that tofurkey jerky won't keep them back much longer."

Tofu bi-products.

"I'm worried that not everyone knows I'm a vegan!"

'The flowers look good.'

"We'd like to promote the concept of a nontraditional Thanksgiving."

Vegan Cat

"I'll have the vegan."