Vape Virtuoso T-Shirts

"Say - this electronic bourbon isn't bad."

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

'How do you folks get away with such flagrant violation of Prohibition?'

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

'I thought that 'remote gizmo' was just for manoeuvring the caravan down the drive!'

My therapist says I should take up basket making as a pastime!

Need a vitaminlike pill, but don't want to risk the side effects? Then try the world's first multivitamin placebo! They don't do any good, but they don't do any harm either.

“I’m stayin’ home — I want the world to know — I pro-bab-ly won’t go!”

"This is nice. You have your knitting and I have my vodka."

'Coleridge'

Spiro & Pusho: watering the vine and the neighbour.

House proud woman vacuums hair from dog.

Annette von Droste-Hulshoff

"When a wine rates over ninety, this is not alcoholism."

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

'Ladies no more messy pet hairs to worry about with the Decko Dynamic!'

I'm a songbird. He's my lyricist.

Beatlemania: Open 24/8

Wino Appreciation Group

'This is all without rhyme or reason.'

'Apparently, my wine-tasting computer liked the '86 Haut Brion a bit too much - it didn't leave any for us.'

Writer

Poetry repairman

'Your husband started without me, didn't he?'

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

'They call me the 'grandfather' of Hip-Hop!'

"I'm right off my quinoa doc."

"House red, sir?"

"Turn down the bass."