Vanity Viper T-Shirts

"A minute on the lips"

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"I just hope the world doesn't end before people can see our outfits."

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

'I'm having a bad whisker day.'

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

Complete Makeover

How do I love me? Let me count the ways. Ok. You have 18,523 selfies.

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

The Eternal Question

"Believe me, you never looked better since you fell into that vast of skin cream."

"...And please let at least one person admire my new hat!"

TV-Mirror.

'Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's is the fairest arse of all?'

'Cosmetic surgery.'

'I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I had the whitest teeth!'

'Your new teeth whitener is keeping me up.'

"Buy them - and never look back."

'The hair plugs are that noticeable, huh?'

A man with a look alike lion's mane hair style.

"Would you look at the carrot on that guy!"

'A crack team of scientists searches tirelessly for a cure for baldness.'

'And, may I add, this hat does not scream, 'Bald Guy'.'

"Maybe if I put these under my pillow I'll get a visit from the hair fairy."

'of course it's not natural: He dyes his mane to cover up his grey hair...'

Martha went to desperate lengths to avoid flat hair.

'I had a little cosmetic surgery done this week.'