Vanity Vixen T-Shirts

"In your case we’ll begin the facelift with an incision behind your right ear and extend it into the waiting room."

Beauty regime

Martha went to desperate lengths to avoid flat hair.

Complete Makeover

Bad Hair Day.

"Believe me, you never looked better since you fell into that vast of skin cream."

"Her age is a millinery secret. She keeps it under her hat."

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

Toast at the Ball

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

"Do you have any of that after shave that makes me look like Brad Pitt?"

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

'I'm having a bad whisker day.'

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

"Za Za Bling Bling goes man hunting."

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

The Eternal Question

'Cosmetic surgery.'

'Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's is the fairest arse of all?'

Krest Yellow Strips. (Rat performs dental hygiene.)

"...And please let at least one person admire my new hat!"

TV-Mirror.

'I can't see anything through these ridiculous tiny slits, I'll take them.'

'If you ain't broke, I'll fix it.'

'I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I had the whitest teeth!'

'Your new teeth whitener is keeping me up.'

"Such a heavenly night I spent in your bed."

'A crack team of scientists searches tirelessly for a cure for baldness.'