Vanity Table Appreciator T-Shirts

Hair Brushing.

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

Cover Design for the Yellow Book, Vol 3- Street Lamps Lighting a Lady's Toilet Mirror

"Do you have any of that after shave that makes me look like Brad Pitt?"

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

"Hair spray"

Insecurities of the Bald Eagle.

'You certainly lived a remarkable life. Any chance you'll get over yourself?'

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

"And that's me as a shepherdess!"

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

'I can't see anything through these ridiculous tiny slits, I'll take them.'

"Look at me, everyone! I'm amazing!"

Vanity artist

"...And please let at least one person admire my new hat!"

TV-Mirror.

'If you ain't broke, I'll fix it.'

"I see he finally got rid of that idiotic comb-over."

'I turn the other cheek more now that Botox has made it wrinkle-free.'

'Nobody special, but rich enough to build this statue of himself.

'Get the 'extra hold' bear spray. I want to look good when we come out of hibernation.'

'I like to stay fit. Or at least wear a lot of lycra.'

"There's something you should consider before you begin—my hair works hard and it plays hard."

'Ben believes looking suave is the most important part of fly fishing.'

'I'm walking across the nation to raise awareness of my fabulous legs.'

Narcissus

'What would you say about me having my spots enlarged?'

'Having limited funds, Irwin goes with the less expensive chest hair transplant.'

The Paper Silhouette Editor