Vanilla T-Shirts

Ice Cream Surgeon

Giant ape juggling planes and captive.

"Well there's no way I'm going to say 'whom'!"

'Adam and Eve in the garden of Sweden'

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.' (at restaurant with three kids)

'I'm having a bad whisker day.'

"Mom told me to make my vegetables disapear."

Swinging through the jungle.

'Mr. Kong?'

Fresh Blood In Politics

Toupee in a tin.

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.'

"I had to quit my job as a day trader."

'Blah, blah, blah....'

"Look, everyone here loves vanilla, right? So let's start there."

Dracula's false teeth

'I'm tellin' you, Maurice, you should try it. I feel younger, more confident and just yesterday I caught a coupla gibbons checkin' me out.'

New Mall

"Hold it right there buster! Is that a wedding ring I can see?"

'Our son might be 'Lord Greystoke' and all now, but he still writes to us when he needs advice...'

"I'm a mad scientist who developed a weapon to rule the world, but I don't do the crazy 'moohaha' laugh because I'm afraid of being discovered and beaten up by a superhero."

Penile Implants

Jell-O: A Life.

Waiting room.

We just want to be a real boy! Pinocchio. Ikea. Swedish Folktale.

Ping Kong

"I refuse to discuss my selfless passion for public service until my hair, makeup and lighting are perfect."

"How do I get this cross hatching out?"

Planning Department

'There's something about beig locked up with a 500-pound gorilla, highly allergic to cigarette smoke, that works every time'

'We know. He's just fixing the antenna.'

'I'm quite impressed with your blood thirstiness but we won't be able to offer you health benefits eternally.'

'Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not a speaking gorilla. I won 'extreme body make-over' twice in a row.'

'That's not funny, Fred.'

"Please, no flash photography! It reminds him of his embarrassingly awkward yearbook photo!"