Urban Tale Teller Gifts

'I went to a real tough high school -- Our Junior Businessman club used to knock over liquor stores.'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

"Walt Disney on ice."

Horror Stories.

On day twenty nine, Dave decided that he would start to cut his way through the dense forest to find out more about the north side of the island.

Columbus Discovers that when Exploring, It's Not Such A Great idea to Bring The Family Along.

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

Early accounting scandals.

"You're about to learn what New York hot dogs are made from."

Romulus and Remus

Suburban Legend

It's a good thing our neighbors don't know what weirdos we are.

"I'm telling you! They don't know anything! No one is in charge!"

'At least, Men point cameras at you these days: In my day, they pointed guns!'

'Yeah. Yeah... Wolf, girl, grandma. I got the picture.'

'Do you honestly expect me to believe that fairy tale?

'... But of course, if there's something more interesting outside.'

"No squirrel, but I found Jimmy Hoffa."

'And now for my William Tell shot.'

"I'm going to read a statement and then I'll take questions.''

Myths and Other Urban Legends

Santa 'Loverboy' Kong

Mega Construction Company: Paving Paradise and Putting Up Parking Lots for Over 50 Years. Deal with it.

"This next one's a sad little number I call, 'I left my guitar on the F train.'"

'Right lad. This is your first night on the beat. I want you to walk through the graveyard without whistling.'

"If you look at Lexington Avenue, it is anyone's guess what's happening on the 6 train. Moving on to Broadway, I can tell you that the N and R Lines may or may not be running smoothly, while the Eighth Avenue A and C are, as always, a complete mystery."

'It started off as stories I told my wife.'

I swear, we rode right through the town and my mistress Lady Godiva wasn't wearing a thing...