Urban Philosophers Gifts

'Sure I'd like to have everything but where would I put it?'

A burial service being held on the sidewalk in a city.

Poor family say grace around a bin.

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

No Immediate Danger

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

Ask not for whom happy hour ends. It ends for thee.

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

Men gossiping

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

"The end of my favorite series is near."

'I love this street...it's so real man...'

"I can hear Brooklyn becoming played out."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

Can't even hold signs well.

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

ONE HORSE TOWN

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

'Man. Piltdown Man.'

'Nothing like being your own boss, huh?'

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

"Time like these make me wish we had sprung for that apartment with a park view."

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

"You're going to regret this in the morning."

Brickie's Mate