Philosopher Of City Life Gifts

Can't even hold signs well.

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

Hoodie Hang-out

No Immediate Danger

"The end of my favorite series is near."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

"I can hear Brooklyn becoming played out."

'I love this street...it's so real man...'

'Nothing like being your own boss, huh?'

"Time like these make me wish we had sprung for that apartment with a park view."

Populating URBAN DICTIONARY.

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

'It's not easy to get one of these - before that you have to have found a parking space!'

Demonic Repossession.

'It's an idea whose time has come, Mr. Mayor -- 'drive-through traffic court'!'

"On a clear night when the stars are twinkling over the city, I almost don’t mind that civilization collapsed."

From Here You Can See Bugger All

"Thank god we're out of the city."

'See, Jimmy, as the population grows too dense, the rats begin to brutalize each other...'

"Hmm...any dietary restrictions?"

One youth says: 'Lamppost, bollard, tarmac, kerb.' Other says: Zebra crossing,traffic hump, postbox.' Caption: Street language

This is where Brent council sends you

"When satire becomes indistinguishable from reality, there's a problem."

Your logic is flaccid and your data suppositional, dawg!

Amongst the rush.

'He lives in a house, and it's by the side of the road, but he's still not a friend to man.'

"One day, son, all these skyscrapers that we built for no reason and lie empty will be yours."

"Did you order takeout?"

"I don't miss my accountancy life. I find I get out more nowadays."

'I warned you we'd get thrown out, changing the name from the Garden of Eden.'

"Of course, you try to raise your kids so they won't need lawyers."

Yeah, I'm standing here alone yelling a bunch of nonsense. If I had a cell phone, you wouldn't bother me!

"The first step towards solving New York's City's problems is to STATE them, which I will now proceed to do."

'I was hoping you could help me with an implant.'