Universe Gourmand T-Shirts

'What d'you say to a massive Szechuan-style wok fry-up before we start?'

The wonderful world of cheese.

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

Grand Escargot at a Parisian Eatery.

World Food Summit - No food and drink allowed in the auditorium.

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

Just one more choccy...

A London gent abroad

"It's just like the regular stew only it's got some bits of matter in it we can't identify."

'Are you ready for dessert?'

'Your fish dinner should be along shortly. Frank just had a nibble.'

'I couldn't put the book down... I had peanut butter and jelly on my hands!'

'Don't worry, Sir. Most of our customers get indigestion when they see the bill.'

'You could use more fiber in your diet; go sow a few wild oat brans.'

"Jeffrey eats everything, Mom, because no one has told him what he doesn't like."

Dijon Vu

"Of course this is a pizza! Man, I've always been a rebel!"

"Love the cheese - not so sure about the presentation."

"Table number five have just eaten their table decoration!"

God Cooks Up Evolution

Endangered Entrees

'It seems the environment people, the health department and the food and drug administration all have reservations about his place.'

'Chefs, the secret ingredient for tonight's competition is - wing of bat!'

The experience was exhilarating. You could eat like a pig and weigh nothing.

No matter where. . . everyone gravitates toward the kitchen.

Capturing a Cook

"The book, How to Serve Man! It's. . . It's a cook book, filled with recipes that use MSG and transfats!"

"If I'm billing six hundred dollars an hour, lunch just cost me $ 638.75."

China in Space.