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Psychologist is SHOCKED by what his elderly patent is telling him.

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

'So it's with a heavy heart that I leave you good people of St. Paul's and accept the calling to be minister at the Sunnydell Nudist Colony...'

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

"What did Jesus order?"

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

Fyodor Dostoevsky

'MUM, go and get Daddy, there's another knight coming: This is so much fun!'

"Now here's a tale that'll make you hair stand on end"

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

Queen says: 'Mirror, mirror, on the wall ... 'It's all so subjective' is not an acceptable answer.'

Fishing.

"Can you hurry up with that will? I don't have all day."

'And all the executive board members got lovely big payouts and lived happily ever after!'

'Pirate's Cove is about a half mile down the beach.'

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

"'Best wishes'? That's it? That's all you got?!"

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

Fairy tale

'Tarzan's younger brother, Ed, was raised by sloths.'

'Rapunzel, Rapunzel! Let down your hair extensions.'

'I thought you were going for a walk in the woods. Your porridge has been cooling on the table for hours! '

"The Ugly Duckling didn't know why he was so attracted to swan culture."

"Love your ambiance!"

Death Photobombs a Holiday