Undiscovered Artist Gifts

"They told me I was going places. They just never told me where."

'Now that I have your attention...'

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

Kid doing cave paintings

""Stop fidgeting. This is supposed to be a still-life."

'Oil painting is fine, but I can't do watercolours, obviously...'

Maria Sibylla Merian

"Are my breasts AI? No! My cartoonist would never use AI!"

Congratulations! - You have been nominated for the Turner Prize...

'It wasn't premeditated.

Mammoth Posing

"Your clock watching and staring into space skills are top notch!"

"It doesn't do you any good being depressed about your job, because you're stuck doing it for the rest of your life."

"I can write, but I can't draw."

"Then we just cut the cartoons with a little more baby laxative."

Stu just wanted to participate in the outdoor art class. . . alone. . . but Bob went ahead and invited himself anyway. . .

(Gallerie Martorelli) (Art-Babble spoken here)

"Ok, maybe a surprise party wasn't the best idea."

Antiques

"Apparently he only uses fugitive colours."

Invisible throng murmuring appreciation of invisible art at London's Hayward Gallery.

"I say if he wants to take up ballet, we should let him."

'You said you went to night classes to draw birds, and when I asked whether they had clothes on and you said they didn't - you know I didn't expect this!'

Don't give up the hunting and gathering.

"Instead of 'It sucks' you should say, 'It doesn't speak to me.'"

'Just a minute, I forgot something.'

'Yeah, they're neat tattoos, but they're only visible at shearing time each year...'

I'm leaving the band in order to pursue a solo career.

The Artist's garret.

"How much do you want off the top?"

"One day, many years from now, we'll look back at this and laugh."

Paint by numbers stained glass windows

Fuzz - The band will never lose its artistic integrity.

"If they say 'Rubensesque' in their profile, they mean they're a Botero."