Unconventional Home Lover Gifts

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

"I always thought of my childhood home as being larger."

'It started out as just a little knot on the floor,'

' ... and this is the half bath.'

'Brian's saved us a small fortune...making all our own furniture!'

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Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

"To keep warm in winter you're looking at a new central heating system costing £20,000."

Bookworm in book, sign reads: 'Tome, Sweet Tome.'

'This place is rather unusually located. Do you folks like sunsets?'

The Big Tree

'We live in a designer trainer.'

Fireplace Projector.

Coming Soon: Haunted Homes on 60-foot lots.

'Brew?'

"Yes, I appreciate that it's a converted fire station. But I still think I'd prefer stairs."

'Oh, it's perfect, George! And it has termites, too!'

"The building is fully renovated with VR in every unit...let's put these on to view the kitchen."

"When you said you lived in a fishbowl, I just assumed you never got out."

"Interesting story behind this one..."

'It's no spelling mistake-the dining room is in the basement.'

"The one's an en suite and the other's a walk-in wardrobe."

"People don't live like that anymore."

"Kick ass!"

Satan in the fireplace

"I bought a new summer condo."

"Careful in the bathroom—we just had it reimagined."

'Did you mess with the thermostat again?'

Repossessed Properties.

An Englishman's home is his sand castle.

"The seller is highly unmotivated."

"It has some charming original features."