Unconventional Caroler Gifts

'Darling, it's the local Satanists wondering whether they can sing us some black metal.'

Old Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes

"I broncobust and I Dust-Bust. You got a problem with that?"

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

The Hammer

'Pink isn't EITHER the new black!'

Violin family at Christmas

"Maybe we should just let heaven and nature sing."

Champagne at the hunt

"You heard your mother. There's no need to bless the superfoods."

Matador Artificial Insemination.

'School of secondary sex characteristics'

'Ach, Herr Scrooge - ghost of this, ghost of that...serious delusions.'

'The MCC celebrate a famous victory' group of dodgy looking old English men holding drinking glasses

"O Holy night - Aye! The stars are brightly shining - YUH!"

"You're not supposed to throw tinned rice!"

'I hate the new vicar's cheese and wine parties.'

'Yes, we're trying to re-introduce some of the more traditional breeds.'

'I'm not going to bore you with a long sermon to-day - here's one I recorded earlier...'

'Frankly, I think his caroling was better before he launched a solo career.'

"That's the trouble with costume drama - so easy to foul up."

"Good King Worcestershire looked out on the feast of Stephen..."

"Congratulations, you've passed."

"You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixon..."

"...to save us all from Satan's power..."

"I'd prefer this to a gold watch any day."

Sled Dogs Instead Of City Bikes

"Oh, we're just here for the party."

The 12 Snacks of Christmas

20 years as Stamp Club Chaorman and they send my retirement card by E-MAIL.

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

Rum Pah Pum Pum!

Christmas-Plex

artwork and production

Carols