Udder Genius Gifts

"I've given up on trying to improve the quality of my milk: It just ends up mixed with milk from other cows in a big vat..."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

'Henderson always walks away with the neighborhood pumpkin carving contest.'

Cow writer.

"Mum, please jump up and down . . . I feel like a milkshake."

'Lord, we thank thee for the bounty we're about to receive.'

Yoghurt man

'At milking time, I just love the soft hands of the new young farm hand: A nice change from old farmer John's...'

Who are you?

'Oi! We're your nipples you idiot!'

Sinking cruise ship, with band member saved by floating on cello.

'Agghh...I've done something practical, taken up by industry...and I've been thrown out of the Mad Scientist Club!'

"Need help with your computer project? I have two teens at home."

'Be gentle with me!'

Speech bubble showing EUREKA! back to front.

"I'm afraid Mr.Edison is too busy to discuss your idea with you at this time. Please call again, Mr Fluorescent."

"Why do you have to be so smart? You'd be more popular if you acted normal."

Einstein Ponders the Mysteries of Space and Time

This Digital Life - as experienced by the bottom of a coffee cup.

Our shock absorbers give such a smooth ride that the professor here will try to split an atom in the back of a moving pick up truck.

Two cows are admiring a female cow that has an extra udder - 'Hey Colin... check out Barbara's awesome moob job!'

Help! Original inventor of multi-tasking.

'MILK ME!'

I told you before, never call me on this number!

Cheese maker

'It's voice activated, password protection software. Now, the cat can't log on using my screen name.'

"Looks like somebody had some 'work' done."

"Congratulations on winning the milking contest."

Don't get wet.