Twisted Tale Enthusiast Gifts

'We're looking for the girl who kicked the prince at the ball last night.'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Fishing Tales

The Tale of the Tape of the Tail.

"Well did he?"

Fishing Boat Derby

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

"That's right kiddo, I'm one of the original band members of the Musicians of Bremen..."

Men reading Tall Stories, and Short Stories in a Library

'All this is nuthin! There was one yeaw up noth...when it snowed fah two yeaws! I had t'dig down ten feet t'haul in my lobstah traps.'

"Yes, I was using my mobile whilst driving... I was calling the police to tell them I was chasing a gang of bank robbers!"

"At long last, Wyatt, our dream has come true and we are within reach of the legendary toast fields of the Sierra Madre."

"Pecos Bildungsroman"

A Salmon Lie

Captain Eddie's New Boat:'The insurance company laughed last year when I insisted on adding Kraken coverage.'

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

'That's right kids: I jumped through rings of fire when I was with the Circus!'

"The true story"

'He doesn't exaggerate, he just remembers big.'

"So I break free and I swear that hook was this big."

Paul Bunyon, Castaway

"This is your great-great-uncle Enchilmo Ladas. We called him 'Enchi' for short."

'I don't believe for one minute that an octopus crawled up last night and ate all the coconuts!'

'Women don't simply believe everything we hear, you know.' - 'But that does not stop you repeating it.'

'He's lying about either a fish or his penis.'

A Tale of the Sea

"In your original statement, you said the fish was much bigger."

"His nose grew every time he lied? That must've taken all the fun out of fishing."

"I must have hit 20 home runs!"

Tall tales and Short stories

Fisherman catches the Big Fish

"You've been exaggerating again, haven't you?"

'It was owned by a little ol' lady who didn't drive it. She used a motor scooter on Saturdays.'

'The vet did it.'