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Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

'He's not a pet. He's an endangered species.'

Television Readers.

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

Welcome To New York City...Subject to the following conditions.

'Buying the inflight entertainment system was a great idea of yours, Dear...'

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

Man: 'How cute. He must like the movement.' Cat: 'There are some challenging themes here but little or no dramatic resonance.'

We saw this episode of Grey's Anatony, I recognize the symptoms.

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

7 Dwarves of Retirement

Kids ask repetitively: 'Is the recession over yet?'

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

"Well what does the GPS say?"

Welcome to the moon cafe and gift shop...

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

"Honey, can you read through our list and let me know if I forgot anything?"

Homo Zapiens

Tunnel of TV

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

'Can't you at least wait until half time?!'

"Where do you remember last seeing your glasses?"

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

"Which way to the Mona Lisa? We're double-parked."

"If I were you, I wouldn't change the channel!"

Be open to help.

"Oh, it was lovely down there. Two golf courses, miles of unspoiled beaches, an air of quiet elegance..."

Western Outfitters.

'You should know better than to switch channels during a Garfield special.'

'Have you any idea just how little this is worth?'

'Aloha! On behalf of the tourist board may I thank you for visiting our remote and mysterious island - Have a nice day!'