Tv Show Participant Gifts

Become a 'paranormal' investigator...

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

"I've had enough of watching grass grow. What's on the Paint Drying Channel?"

"Nostalgia is one helluva drug."

Haywatch

"Hello, and welcome to 'Homes Under the Hammer. . .'"

"Hmmm... what would Scooby Doo?"

Time Management

'Yes, that person there...'

James May

Woke Jersey Shore

A-Hem! I'm still singing here!

Life stripped bare

Open Mike Night Presents the Comedy Stylings of Rudy Park. Did you hear about the iPhone that hired the best wedding planner in the country because it wanted a great reception? Clap. And then there was the autocorrect programmer who got rejected when he asked a lady out on a debate. The romance didn't last long when the cable tv box found out how spacey the satellite tv box was. Get off the stage! The one who invented binary code was a real zero. Boo. Hiss. I don't even get that one, and I'm gla

Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, unless it's a really sensational lie that will boost our ratings?

'You can't vote him off, dear - he's the newsreader'

"This could be fun! Don't you do magic tricks, Cruz?"

'And now for some fresh and existing commercials before we get back to our dull, uninteresting, and hum-drum story.'

"Hi, we're Intensive Care Bears."

'What have I told you about laughing on purpose, Mother?'

"Quiet? I'd even read for the understudy part for someone who is between engagements."

American's Funniest Tax Decuctions

"Set phazers to medium rare!"

'Congratulations on reaching the grand final, how does it feel to be the biggest loser of all time?'

The Bob Dole Home-Shopping Network

Anton Mosimann

"Bork! Bork!"

The Dark Side of the Lone Ranger

'I can't eat it! It's too horrible!' 'It's not I'm a Celebrity...Mum's dished up some wonky carrots.'

'But now for the good news, Bob. The replay was shown repeatedly on Sports Center.'