Tv Jingle Aficionado Gifts

'Fine old-fashioned musical evening this turned out to be - Can't you all sing anything except television jungles?'

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"Think of it as buying in – not selling out."

Television Readers.

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

Hacking through ice in order to fish

"I know! Two years without anymore Game Of Thrones?"

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

'Redneck Goldfish' Earl knew better than to watch Oprah while drinking.

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

Tarzan has gone into advertising. He's king of the jingle now.

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

100 best beheadings

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

"It was your idea to install the TV dish on the church spire"

'-Not THE Queen Vic?'

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

"He's an indoor cat."

'Do you expect the jury to believe that? And, more importantly, do you expect the viewers of the eventual TV movie of this trial to believe it?'

'There's no such thing as 'ookawooka-itis' -- You have got to stop watching doctor shows!'

'Could you pass me my - oh thankyou.'

"To be honest, I'm leaving public service so I can make some real money as a talking head on a cable news network."

"I'm looking for a wife who likes to fish, go to the footy, play cards, watch TV, cook, drink and wash dirty socks."

Couch and Potato

Mog The Week