Tv Dinner Tycoon T-Shirts

"If I had a restaurant, it would be called the Can and Microwave"

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

"I'd hold off on the peking duck another five minutes...the show's almost over."

"The usual."

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

"Today's special is we'll pull the plug on the jukebox if someone else's music annoys you."

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

Continental Breakfast...$2.99: 'What continent is THIS supposed to represent?'

A short-order cook gets sucked into the exhaust vent over the grill.

A train's dining car is a diner.

Traditional Family Meals

"When dad cooks dinner, it's hard to tell if he's opening cans for us or the cat."

'You're so sophisticated and witty...and muscular...do you work out? Why, yes, I'd love to come back to your place.'

'Did anyone save a stomach for dessert?'

'Is that freshly brewed?'

'Trouble cutting pickled onions.'

"I try not to be picky, but this meal is a bit too sticky!"

"Waiter, there's a fly in my soup, and ironically, there's also a crouton in my s**t."

Hugo's in a peevish mood today, I'd finish that broccoli if I were you

"I suppose in your day, you would have called these, 'radio dinners'."

"How was the food sir?"

Soup on a stick

It's definitely the soup of the day, alright. I'm just not sure which day.

Diner has sign: Ask about our frequent fryer plan.

Sporting World God: And on the seventh day he stitched up the television broadcast rights.

"The Grumpy Old Man comes with a side of, Get A haircut, Turn That Thing Down or Get Off My Lawn."

'You don't need a menu here, mate. If you can't see it on my apron, we don't sell it.'

"Good evening, my name is Hank. I'm your waiter tonight. This is Eddy, he is our cooks' lawyer."

"So, who ordered the burger platter with endless fries?"

'Soccer Mom's Diner.'