Turtle Fan Gifts

'Don't worry. I've got your back.'

'First, you've got to learn to slow down...'

Newborn bird sees tortoise and starts wearing shell.

"Nice shell!"

'C'mon This is for Facebook'

"Tell him I'm not in."

"In my opinion, the best invention was the TV-remote: It used to take me ages to change channel when I had to walk from the couch to the TV..."

"So, have you been in for six months, years or decades?"

'That was a scary movie, wasn't it?'

Turtle bumps turtle: 'WHIPLASH!'

'How's the egg?' '.Turtle crawls out'

Yeah, the commute is killing me too: I live a full kilometre away...

'Found you again. You know, we may want to consider hiding somewhere other than our shells when playing 'Hide-And-Seek'. Just sayin...'

'I always wash it before applying the turtle wax.'

I hate it when those big rigs zoom past you like they own the road!

Yeah, we'll see how your abs looks when you're 150.

Wow, that jerk gave you a serious wedgie.

Poor guy fell asleep with his head in the sap.

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

"Nuts to you, too."

Ralph spent his Sundays in the park gathering nuts.

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

"I've got you in my sights now, Mister Squirrel, with your fluffy tail and those tiny hands clutching that itty-bitty nut. Aww, you must be hungry...poor little fella... I love you, Mister Squirrel."

Three lanes of traffic with the first two lanes crowded with turtles. The third lane (to the left) a couple rabbits speeding along without any traffic. An easy pass sign has carrots replacing dollars.

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

Turtle Trailer Court

"The library rejected your request to ban all books on cats and squirrels. But, to be fair, it was no dumber than all the other book ban requests we get."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"As you can see, our corporate structure is turtles all the way down."

Baby squirrel & Berries

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

Tiger Costume

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

'I thought I would rent it out for the extra dough.'