Turophile Humorist Gifts

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

The Main Types of Cheese

Cheese

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

A Semicolon.

"Any talents besides tasting good?"

Angst - Zeitgeist.

"I like a diet rich in surfers."

"They call you Abominable and me a monster, and they don't even know us."

'Hell's freezing over. The only thing I can figure is McWit Construction actually finished a job on time.'

"Wow, 27, not bad! Me, I've ruined 53 surfing competitions..."

EEEEEEEEEEEE-Mail

"The trouble with this town is there is no day life."

'I didn't know these cars had such a large tank.'

"Can you hear me now?"

"I'm just a mouse, standing in front of a scientist, asking her for cheese."

"I still miss the good old days....before everything went wireless!"

"Some people are reluctant to accept change."

"Weird - it must have gotten mixed in with the office supplies when I left the job."

"Don't get me wrong I think these new GPS systems will revolutionise ploughing."

'Make sure you get unleaded...'

"I can handle the 'Gobble,' but you're going to have to find someone else to translate the 'Dygook' part."

Tide-l Wave.

“Hey You Get off of my cloud”

'Hey, look!'

'This guy REALLY leads a sheltered life- he lists Santa as a reference.'

I didn't realise you sold shoes!

In Texas, Smith and Wesson beats a royal flush.

Overpriced gumball machine.

A horse and rider go to fetch some petrol for a stranded horse trailer.

The hermit has relocated...

"I guess we should exchange insurance."

Cheese/Extra Cheese

Tiered cheese