Turophile Gifts

The Main Types of Cheese

"I'm just a mouse, standing in front of a scientist, asking her for cheese."

"Definitely smells better inside."

Tiered cheese

Cheese

"Cheese isn't everything; it's the only thing."

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"But how do I accomplish that in 140 characters or less?"

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

'You wanted a tractor intead of a wedding car, and our dogs as bridesmaids... so why shouldn't I have one of my cows as best man?'

"I think my mom made me a tofu sandwich."

"Grandpa, how did you ever survive without apps?"

'This book thing, Mum, where do I plug it in?'

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

"I hacked into Santa's computer and added a few gifts. It pays to have computer skills."

Brexit

Lisbon Treaty.

Computer Head

"Well, NOW I can't sleep worrying about how much we spent on this high-tech mattress!"

Federica Mogherini

"They're perfect astronauts. Fast velocity followed by a long, slow pace."

'You're kinky, aren't you, Samuel?'

Copier is hypnotizing office worker.

Persian

"Please don't blow it out, I've just invented it."

"Wow! This car has a continental kit, train horn, smoothed-out firewall, polyurethane bushings and a 2400-CFM fan! I have a long way to go!"

The Line-up

David Cameron and Europe

Let's do the continental.

Brexit Seasons

Juncker: He Had a Dream...