Turophile Gifts

The Main Types of Cheese

"I'm just a mouse, standing in front of a scientist, asking her for cheese."

"Definitely smells better inside."

Tiered cheese

Cheese

"Cheese isn't everything; it's the only thing."

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"Remember when it was 'The Dog and Duck'?"

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"But how do I accomplish that in 140 characters or less?"

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

"Charles didn't like tofu."

'No, you can't play Space Invaders in it.'

'You wanted a tractor intead of a wedding car, and our dogs as bridesmaids... so why shouldn't I have one of my cows as best man?'

"Grandpa, how did you ever survive without apps?"

"I think my mom made me a tofu sandwich."

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

"I hacked into Santa's computer and added a few gifts. It pays to have computer skills."

'This book thing, Mum, where do I plug it in?'

Brexit

Lisbon Treaty.

"They're perfect astronauts. Fast velocity followed by a long, slow pace."

Computer Head

Federica Mogherini

"Well, NOW I can't sleep worrying about how much we spent on this high-tech mattress!"

Fast Lane. cars Like yours.

Maria Teresa Vera

'You're kinky, aren't you, Samuel?'

Copier is hypnotizing office worker.

David Cameron and Europe

Persian

The Line-up

"Wow! This car has a continental kit, train horn, smoothed-out firewall, polyurethane bushings and a 2400-CFM fan! I have a long way to go!"