Turkey Whisperer T-Shirts

'Tom, I think you better rearrange your tail feathers.'

'Before the end of November, we need to learn to do that.'

X-Ray of Turkey

Thanksgiving: 'What did I want to do now?'

"Those giblets are gonna have to come out."

Guidance Office

'I believe we've located the source of the disturbance!'

"I survived this long by telling all the young toms that a farmer will bring an ax to cut the fence down and set free the first turkey he sees."

Where we get Turkey Jerky...

"Well, it was good to know you, Clyde."

"Don't fall for it! He's just trying to fatten you up for Thanksgiving!"

"Are you sure you can trust this doctor?"

"On the basis you have nothing to give thanks for this past year, what say you spare us the chop?"

"It wasn't a farming accident. She just bit my head off again."

"Please remember to baste me. I want a crisp skin, but not burnt! Place me between the mashed potatoes and stuffing. Save my bones and neck for soup. . ."

"So, here's the deal...you give me all your eggs, and I paint them; put them in this basket, and them where no one can find them. After Thanksgiving, I set them all free! Deal?"

"We're raising them for turkey bacon."

"Fortunately for the turkeys, Frank never really got the hang of hunting."

'I'm sleepy all the time.'

'Boy, that is one old Turkey.'

'Mike - how old is that turkey call you're using?'

'Hank, I know you're new at turkey hunting, but that isn't the way you call turkeys.'

'I told him not to wear stretchy pants to dinner.'

Turkey wary of Christmas

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

Police Feline Unit

Cat woman shopping for cats.

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Speed Dating for Turtles

Braiding a Horse's Tail

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

"It get it – you're hungry."

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting