Turkey Whisperer Pillows

'Tom, I think you better rearrange your tail feathers.'

'Before the end of November, we need to learn to do that.'

Thanksgiving: 'What did I want to do now?'

"Those giblets are gonna have to come out."

Guidance Office

'I believe we've located the source of the disturbance!'

"Well, it was good to know you, Clyde."

"Don't fall for it! He's just trying to fatten you up for Thanksgiving!"

"Are you sure you can trust this doctor?"

"Please remember to baste me. I want a crisp skin, but not burnt! Place me between the mashed potatoes and stuffing. Save my bones and neck for soup. . ."

"We're raising them for turkey bacon."

"Fortunately for the turkeys, Frank never really got the hang of hunting."

'I'm sleepy all the time.'

'Boy, that is one old Turkey.'

'Mike - how old is that turkey call you're using?'

'Hank, I know you're new at turkey hunting, but that isn't the way you call turkeys.'

Turkey wary of Christmas

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

Police Feline Unit

Cat woman shopping for cats.

Braiding a Horse's Tail

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

"It get it – you're hungry."

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

Biofelineism

Children's Feast.

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

"Hon, come quick! Mr. Puff has lowered his impenetrable wall of feline indifference, and it probably won't last long!"

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

Cats want answer to the big questions in life.